This has nothing to do with anything, but it’s here anyway (v. brief)

I just realised it’s been over a week since I last updated, and the massive(ish) comment thread for the last entry had caused me to lose track of things. It’s presently 7:45am and I’ve been up all night, so I’m not in any shape to write much right now. However, I did just upload this to Veoh after rescuing it from a dying VHS tape, so I thought I might as well link to it.

To anybody who doesn’t remember early 90′s Australian teen idol Bruce Samazan, it’ll just be a load of self-indulgent wank with occasional nods toward a Coke commercial. Even if you do remember the guy, it still won’t make the interminable “Bruce has lunch with his friends” scene go any faster. Basically, if “A day with Bruce Samazan” doesn’t sound appealing to you, I wouldn’t watch it. Even his Coca Cola rap about twenty minutes in doesn’t justify sitting through the preceding twenty minutes of tedious fishing anecdotes to get there.

I’ll write something better soon.

PS. Some kid actually paid RRP for this in 1992, you know.

THEY ARE DROWNING OUT MALE VOICES WITH THEIR EVIL MOVIE TRAILER >:(

Comments which have been left on the YouTube trailer for the documentary Girls Rock! The Movie, about a rock n’ roll camp for girls who look to be between about 9 and 17. All of this was generated within twelve hours of the video appearing.

Richie: The laptop is fixed! Audience: OH NO IT ISN’T!

The motherboard is fixed, anyway. It works and I didn’t lose any data. The keyboard, however… doesn’t. And I have no idea why, because it was about the only part that wasn’t broken when I sent it off. I’m typing this with a USB keyboard, and I’m too busy to get the fucking thing repaired again in the near future because the repair place is 45 minutes away and I don’t have a car.

UPDATE AN HOUR LATER, AKA “OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT”

“It”- I’m unsure if it’s the computer or the keyboard – keeps thinking that keys are being pressed / held down when they aren’t. Half the time I try to enter URLs, it prints “……….sqer………..]………….]………wr…….[]……….[[[............]” or something. Since it’s unlikely that I’m receiving alien transmissions, I’ll assume that the machine is breaking down again. For the fourth fucking time this month. It’s less than two years old. I haven’t taken it apart, dropped it or spilled anything in it, and I haven’t even installed any software for over a year. Even if this miraculously turns out not be the fault of the manufacturers, I’m still never buying anything by Toshiba in the future out of pure spite.

itjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj,.[]

…that just happened then. I thought I’d leave it in to show you what’s going on. Also, this: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

No, I’m not doing this deliberately. It’s just randomly printing rows of letters / symbols while I type. And, while it’s doing that, I can’t use any other programs.

I’m one more problem like this away from becoming a Luddite and blogging via carrier pidgeon.

Games Workshop headdesk moment #2

 

And what did you learn at school today?

My brother’s class made Mother’s Day gifts on Friday. I thought this was a nice idea. In fact, it made me unreasonably happy, because a few days earlier I’d seen a Mother’s Day catalogue that advertised X-Box 360 games, not in a “Just because a woman has given birth doesn’t mean she can’t enjoy blowing up cities in a giant robot” way, but because they’ll keep the children busy while mum relaxes. The commercialisation of Mother’s Day has reached the point where the mothers themselves are expected to buy gifts for their children to shut them up. Like every other day. I know I shouldn’t be that surprised, but I am. Sort of.

What my brother’s class made their mothers:

The Alphabet of Manliness: It’s very, very bad. Possibly even worse.

Maddox’s lack of bulging biceps may actually be a positive thing. Because having him become the symbol and policy-maker of all things alpha male just may be one of the most subversive byproducts of the Internet since file-sharing.

- Neil Strauss, author of The Game and some hilarious rape comedy.

You know those old SF movies where computers will catch fire and chant ‘DOES-NOT-COM-PUTE’ if you feed them illogical information? MADDOX IS SUBVERSIVE. See, it doesn’t work.

Stop-gap #2: Limp Bizkit Edition

I was thinking about this the other day and dug it up to see if it was as bad as I remembered. It was.

A brief stop-gap headdesk moment before I have to vacate temp computer for the night

Did nobody involved in the production of the Warhammer 40,000 rulebook think that making the only black guy in this squad into a shirtless, axe-wielding savage stereotype called “Axe Man” might not have been a good idea…?

Computer Go Boom

Well, it was more of a fizzle. My laptop stopped working some time last night, and I’m writing this from my parents’ PC. I think it’s a hardware problem rather than a software one, so hopefully it just needs the battery replaced or something and I haven’t lost all my essays. I had the important stuff backed up on an external hard drive anyway, so it’s not a huge drama, but my updates / comment moderation / comments on other peoples’ blogs will be either erratic or non-existent until it gets repaired.

Update: Apparently it’s just the transformer, and they’ve ordered a replacement which should be here in a few days.

Update #2: The Alphabet of Manliness arrived this afternoon. Is there some sort of planetary conjunction going on or what?

Update #3: My mother is much shorter than me, and working at her ergonomically designed desk is causing me incredible neck pain. Along with #2, this isn’t helping my mood. On the plus side, I’ve had enough free time to rewatch the first half of I, Claudius.

Update #4: The Alphabet of Manliness has an entire chapter on Chuck Norris, which makes me think of those two executives from The Simpsons. ”Fad or not, it’s here to stay!”.

Update #5: This one time Chuck Norris got a huge boner and he killed a dinosaur with it and saved this hot babe with awesome tits. Pirates. Then he copped a feel because he was so manly but she slapped him because she was an uptight bitch so he punched her in the ovaries and killed her. Lumberjacks. Now, was that really worth $15.95 US?

Update #6: No fat women allowed. Women talk too much. Women can be bought off with flowers. If a woman’s breasts are visible, she’s asking to be groped. Women who don’t shave are ugly. If a woman agrees to come to your house, she’s consenting to sex. Women are irrational and have never done anything worthwhile. This book is described as “rebelling against the status quo”. Mmm.